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Danifan13
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Name: Jeremy(chicken)
Birthday: 8/6/1987
Gender: Male
Interests: I love music.....playing it, listening to it, makin it. and i love food.....its one of the greatest things in the world....
Expertise: i can eat....and play.....i'm set for life.
Occupation: Retired
Industry: Entertainment
Message: message me
AIM:  Deftonesfreak1
Member Since:
10/13/2004
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| Today.....sucks. I feel like I'm sinking. I totally just want this feeling gone. I don't understand your thought patterns..how are you not seeing how much you're tearing me apart. Karma? From past mistakes haunting me? Only thing I can think of.
I just don't know what to do.....it'd be nice to have someone...to talk to.
I've been there for so Many, but when I reach out it's as no ones there. | | |
| No.no.no.no.no. How? Why? Awoke from a bad dream, a nightmare, a sad dream. Haven't thought of them....in a long time...cept for one day that I was talking about how they made me mad. And boom, in my head. With one of the most vivid, beautiful, haunting, letdown dream ever....it was like I was in a time machine set for one year ago. It seemed so real. I kept asking questions because I was so confused...I couldn't believe it. And a small part of me feels maybe something similar happened to them. We had this weird connection going on..that kept going after. I'd have such strong feelings/memories, only to get online and find out she was feeling the same way. But we no longer have each other online...so no more check ups.. I've been writing new songs...but this one I've been writing up in my head is about it. An "I'm sorry" and it's one of the heaviest songs I've ever written. But that's the way it has to be to portrait how strong the feeling is, and so not just anyone would understand what's being said.
I don't know. I know they'll always have a piece of my heart, but I'm happy in my current situation. Crazy happy. So why are you in my dreams? | | |
| Todays her birthday...my goal is to make it her best year ever...and I'm already failing at it. I feel so blah...like I'm just in the way..idk what to do...I can't give up..I don't want to give up, not with the circumstances we're under...and certainly not with the way I feel. I'm not screwing up this one.. I won't back down so easy.. No rest for these heavy eyes. No stopping till I see things that prove to me I'm doing awesome, I'm so tired of settling for less. Free of leprosy...no longer going to tear myself apart for everyone else..I shall stand my ground. No one else means more to me right now...I can't put anyone else above her right now. Main priority lays next to me and I'm still figuring out how to make it so much better. I'll never be satisfied with ok, never be happy with good. Only the best is what she deserves..no matter how hard I suffer to get it to that point. I'm not doing this just to better my life. But for us... | | |
| So....crazy stuff since the last blog. Um. So things have been kinda interesting to say the least....got with Vanessa..we're happy. New band...sad the old one didn't work out, but happy with the potential of this new one. Just sad cuz I'll never use those lyrics again...and the old band will probly continue on with them. Works picking up...but still not making much..that sucks..looking for new work...craziness!! Got huge huge news..I'll share it with y'all later though... | | |
| What? Really? I was doing so good...well in alot of ways I've Been doing good. Fixed tons of things for the better and it's awesome. In almost all aspects in my life I'm happier then ever! The band is doing Amazing! We're playing shows and in the studio. This is the first band I've been in that I really have so much fun, get the songs stuck in my head, and everyone in the band is cool! Things with the youth are going great! Had a BBQ/capture the flag yesterday, had 40 kids! It was so much fun.
Ran into an old friend, been hanging out with him and Stephen alot lately. This past week and weekend was filled with hilarious fun.
And yet, the past 2-3 days..she's been on my mind again...I was doing so good to just move on..
Since the split, I've had others try and move in and mend my broken heart...but in my mind, there's only her. No one else feels right. I wrote a new song..it's great...but it's a love song, with no love there to be sung to. I have to admit it's one of the better songs I've written.
Augh! This is so frustrating.I feel so down today..and have so much to do.
all I ever do is think about you, baby. I hold you in my arms inside my dreams
And I know what I know and what I know is..That no matter where you go, you will always think of me. As they say: trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you've never met.
Sure there are plenty of fish in the sea..but I'm no where near the sea, I'm in the desert..alone.
God I miss her........... | | |
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